Obituaries

Alan Stebbins
B: 1941-09-06
D: 2020-10-21
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Stebbins, Alan
Wilhelmina Veldhuizen
B: 1928-02-21
D: 2020-10-19
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Veldhuizen, Wilhelmina
Helen Henry
B: 1918-01-27
D: 2020-10-05
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Henry, Helen
Richard Futter
D: 2020-09-27
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Futter, Richard
Marjorie Gray
B: 1927-05-24
D: 2020-09-26
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Gray, Marjorie
Leon Kransler
B: 1951-10-10
D: 2020-09-01
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Kransler, Leon
Michele Sullivan
D: 2020-08-29
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Sullivan, Michele
Charles Manley
D: 2020-08-27
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Manley, Charles
Bonnie Johnson
B: 1961-03-01
D: 2020-08-18
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Johnson, Bonnie
Joyce Morrison
D: 2020-08-02
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Morrison, Joyce
Sarah Frazo
B: 1937-01-19
D: 2020-07-24
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Frazo, Sarah
Carol Fox
B: 1942-12-17
D: 2020-07-24
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Fox, Carol
Justin Burger
B: 1979-12-22
D: 2020-07-15
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Burger, Justin
James Appleton
B: 1940-10-23
D: 2020-07-10
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Appleton, James
William Gunther
B: 1943-01-27
D: 2020-07-03
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Gunther, William
Joan Pike
B: 1935-04-25
D: 2020-06-19
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Pike, Joan
John Fox
B: 1934-09-02
D: 2020-05-26
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Fox, John
Mary Elizabeth Heverin
B: 1930-08-16
D: 2020-05-25
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Heverin, Mary Elizabeth
Rose Mary Harpole
B: 1929-10-08
D: 2020-05-07
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Harpole, Rose Mary
Jack Southcombe
B: 1939-05-13
D: 2020-05-06
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Southcombe, Jack
Robert Poles
B: 1939-09-09
D: 2020-04-18
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Poles, Robert

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CALEDONIA, NY 14423
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Seeking Guidance: Grief Counseling

The 1969 publication of what was to become a landmark book, On Death and Dying, written by Elizabeth Kubler-Ross changed the way we looked at grief. She described five stage of grieving: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance–stages which became the foundation of our understanding of the experience of grief for decades.

But later research has shown that we cope with grief not in linear or cyclical stages, but in a back-and-forth process which moves between the experience of sadness, anger, yearning, or crying; and the experience of feeling joy or contentment. This is almost a “safety valve”, giving the bereaved a period of rest in dealing with their grief.

Grief is, you see, work. And it seems the body intuitively knows that such hard work requires periods of rest.  This natural back-and-forth process helps us to achieve the four essential tasks in grieving:

1. To accept the reality of the loss

2. To work through to the pain of grief

3. To adjust to an environment in which the deceased is missing

4. To emotionally relocate the deceased and move on with life

But what if you get stuck? Perhaps you can’t accept this new reality; or maybe working through the pain of grief is wearing you down. That’s when a qualified grief counselor can help.

We are pleased to provide bereavement services for the families we serve. In addition, we have many community-based resources we can recommend to you. For more information, please feel free to ask us at the funeral home, or contact us here.